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Thursday, February 4, 2010

Support from my support group

Our support group (Empty Cradles) meets the first wednesday of every month. So we walked into our support group meeting last night and I was surprised to see a flower vase with Akul's name on it, a bunch of beautiful flowers, and a cake. My wonderful support group remembered Akul's big day was coming (FEB 13th) and they brought us little tokens to honor our son. I just want to talk about this one moment in time - the cake cutting ceremony. We stood in a semi circle around the carrot cake, holding hands and our friends softly sang "Happy birthday to you..." and we all cried. Every eye teared as I cut Akul's cake. Then we all reached for the clean-x and Virunya walked to the cake and said softly,"We all miss you Akul" - "we do" I chimed in. That moment was mystical - I felt so connected to these people who have lost their babies and who come together to grieve once a month. Bree (of http:// butterflybaby15.blogspot.com), my wonderful friend, drove down with flowers. Bree has stopped working because she is pregnant (most of you probably know her story), but she still came to support us. A couple, lost baby parents who we met through our support group, drove over 60 miles to be with us on this day - just to honor Akul. I wish I did not belong to this club of lost baby parents- actually I wish not one of us did, but I do, and I am so thankful that the people I have found in this club are people like you - my wonderful wonderful support group. This was a beautiful way to honor my angel son. We do not plan to cut a cake on Akul's birthday, so this will be the only cake Akul will have on his first birthday. Thank you so very much for giving us this memory.

14 comments:

  1. Oh Nimoli it sounds beautiful. I didn't know you and Bree knew each other in real life, how lucky to have found a friend in one another. I wish I had that with some of the wonderful women I've connected with through our blogs. I feel so happy to know that Akul was remembered and loved by people who made the effort to come and remember him and celebrate his life with you. It makes me smile imagining the love you felt in those moments. Thank you for sharing, while the angelversary is so hard, hearing about the love and rememberance makes me happy for you and for Akul. Hugs

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  2. Oh wow! What a beautiful way to honor Akul. I am so happy you have the group of wonderful people who support you. And how sweet of Bree to come and visit!!

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  3. Everything came together so nicely that night. Thinking of you, Sunil, and Akul. xoxo

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  4. That is so beautiful. It is wonderful to hear that you are in a support group who really cares for you. And Bree came, how lovely. God Bless.

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  5. That sounds like such a great ceremony! I wish I could have seen that but Im glad that you were surrounded by people that love and miss Akul just as much as you. I'll be thinking about you on the 13th! *HUGS*

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  6. I am so so happy you have such amazingly supportive people in your life. Having never experienced anything like that, through either of our sons deaths its hard to understand. I just know that support like that can change your life. I am so happy that Akul is loved as much as he is. He deserves it. *hugs*

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  7. So glad they did something so nice for you <3

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  8. Reading this made me feel so many different things. I am so happy that you got this experience. I am also jealous because I want to be able to hang out with you and Bree! :) Not for that reason, though-you know what I mean :)
    You deserve this. AKul deserves this.
    Thinking of you!

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  9. You have such a supportive group. Truly an amazing group of people. Not surprising as you and Bree are amazing women. Thinking of all of you.

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  10. Thinking of you and Sunil. Especially these days leading up to Akul's first birthday. You have an amazing support group and a wonderful friend in Bree. I know how much support and kindness you both give to others and I'm so glad that others are there to hold you up too. x

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  11. Hi Nimoli,
    I so wish I could have been at group that night for you. My husband was out of town and I didn't have a sitter. But know that I have been thinking of you and Sunil a lot lately - knowing Akul's birthday is coming up. I am so sad that he is not here. I will light a candle on the 13th and say a prayer to him and sing Happy Birthday. I know he wishes he could be with you - you are the best parents and such special people.
    Kathy

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  12. How nice that his birthday was celebrated in your group and for Bree to come! I'm glad that they all showed their support for such a special date.

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