This Time Last Year

This time last year I was happily pregnant, convinced my lifa was about to change forever. I was in the second trimester of my pregnancy and was filled with happy hormones. Sunil was so full of joy and excitement. We exercised regularly and I was in excellent physical shape. I went for walks every morning and then on the weekends I spent a couple hours doing water aerobics or just floating and dancing around a heated pool. This was my special time with Akul. The pool was usually empty and I coud sing to my baby. I sang all the nursery rhymes I remembered in hindi and English. One day when I was singing "hush little baby, don't say a word...papa's going to buy you a diamond ring..." Sunil joined us. He told me he would not buy his son any "rings." He said his son will not want any jewellery...if it was a girl it would be different. So I rewrote the nursery rhyme.

Hush little baby, don't say a word
mama's going to buy you a singing bird
If your singing bird won't sing
Dad's going to buy you a basketball ring
If the basketball ring is too high
Dad's going to buy you a rocket that flies
If that rocket were to ever break down
You will still be the cutest little baby in town.

When they got Akul off the life support and put him in my arms, I sang this to him. It is his poem, but he barely got to hear it. My baby never got the chance to grow up. To me he will always be the cutest little baby in town.